AuthorMarissa

This is supposed to be good? A book review.

We’ve all been there. Whether in high school English, in college, or while reading for fun everyone has come across a ‘classic’ they hated but every literary critic and high school teacher seems to love.

I came across another one of those books in my 1001 Books to Read Before You Die journey. Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer is the story of an American who returns to Ukraine to find the woman who saved his grandfather’s life during WWII. At least that’s what a normal review will tell you. I will tell you it was the story of an author trying too hard to be funny through language, resulting in dull monologues about nothing but repetitive words just for the author’s pleasure.

Ok, so there were good parts of the book too. I just barely convinced myself to finish it after 4 months of periodically picking it up, and the end was much much better than the first 3/4 of the book. That, however, does not make the book good. I don’t know why any literary critic who actually respects the fact that traditionally books have a plot that isn’t EXTREMELY easily summarized in a sentence or two (read: nothing else happens but the author playing with language) would like this book. But, alas, this book has received some of the highest reviews of any of the 1001 books.

I’m sure I’ll come across more of these – books I expect to be good based on the plot summary and reviews, but I end up hating. This was one of Foer’s first works so maybe the others will be good, but I found this one to be a literary critic’s dream and my worst nightmare.

Link of the Day: Retail Therapy

I gave up shopping for Lent. Specifically buying clothes and shoes. I don’t consider myself to be someone who uses impulse Retail Therapy much, but I do believe wholeheartedly in the therapeutic qualities of a well-planned shoe shopping binge.

Given my Lenten sacrifice, I found this article particularly interesting on Yahoo! Finance.

 

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/retail-therapy-apparently-actually-works-181004390.html

 

Moral of the story: Happy Shopping!

Link of the Day: Onesies The Musical

Onesies!!!

Adult Onesies!!!!

The musical!!!

Link of the Day: Nerdy Language Tidbits

Warning: This link is only for my fellow nerds!

Nerdy Words!

RIP Bachelor Pad

ABC has cancelled Bachelor Pad.

I would say this was the worst decision in the history of ABC, but there’s worse news: Splash hasn’t been cancelled yet. Seriously ABC, Splash can live on but Bachelor Pad can’t? Obviously no one at ABC took my opinion into consideration! I have no desire to see Z-list celebrities dive into a pool. I’d rather see Z-list celebrities live together in a mansion and fight for money or love – which is the show they essentially just cancelled.

New Twitter Handle!

I decided I should have a twitter just for shameless promotion of my blog! Follow me at @college2cube if you want an update via twitter whenever I post anything new (or for the easiest way to reach me)!

Multiple Episodes of Bachelor Thoughts

So I took a few episodes off from blogging my thoughts because the blogs would be easily summarized like this:

 

  1. Tierra is crazy but I’m sad we didn’t get to meet her parents (just to see where she came from).
  2. This is the most awesome season of the bachelor yet for memorable quotes.
  3. AshLee is a psycho control freak. Not just in the capital “L” but in pretty much everything she does there’s a hint of control freak.
  4. Catherine looks exactly like my cousin.
  5. Lindsey seems immature.

So now that it’s down to the final 3 I really hope he sends AshLee home. She freaks me out with her not-so-subtle control issues. I also hope Tierra comes back to steal Sean or something else equally crazy occurs that will lead to drama and excellent television!

 

That’s the spot!

 

Bennie gives me this look whenever I scratch behind his ears! Though I know he can reach it because I’m pretty sure he’s God’s flexibility gift to dogs put in place to motivate me to continue with yoga.

Sorry for the lack of Bachelor posts recently – I’ll catch up soon!

Walking the Dog in Style

Episode 3: Cliffs Notes Version

This week’s thoughts on my favorite show will be non-picture filled, sorry about that…

 

Date 1: Leslie M

This date started off at the Guinness Book of World Records. Ok not in the actual book, but in a museum. After walking around and looking at the museum Sean points out that his own father is in there (um… random), then takes Leslie outside where they will compete for a world record in probably one of the most awkward actually scripted moments in Bachelor history.

So for 3 minutes and 16 seconds they do an onscreen kiss. Chris Harrison’s blog tells me they were too passionate about it the first time and their lips accidentally came apart, so the version they showed was the hilarious “let’s press our lips together and not move while we’re trying not to laugh and we’re moving our hands around each other to make it look to those who can’t view our lips like we’re kissing”. And they showed the whole thing on TV!

Then they had dinner/drinks and Leslie WOULDN’T LOOK AT HIM. I was feeling awkward for them! Despite not looking at him Sean gave her a rose. He likes her and it’s obvious she likes him but she clearly has this weird thing about not looking at him while she’s talking and it bothers me for some reason! But she seems nice so I hope she sticks around awhile.

 

Group Date:

This week’s massive date was beach volleyball. Of course every girl looked fabulous in their swimsuits as they competed (literally) for time with Sean. There were tears and WONDERFUL quotes about how this game was the biggest game of their lives (to which I really want to know if any of them were ever high school or college athletes because this game only mattered for them to get to spend a few more minutes with Sean with 6 other girls).

My favorite part of this date was Chris Harrison appearing on the beach in a long-sleeved shirt and rolled up pants. Clearly he missed the whole little to no clothing memo from Sean and the girls.

Poor Kacie clearly has failed to remember the #1 fastest way to get sent home on this show – discussing drama with the Bachelor himself. She has like 5 minutes here and there with Sean, the last thing she needs to do is bring up drama that didn’t seem to affect her whatsoever! And if she’s going to bring up drama the drama between Desiree and Amanda pales in comparison to what would be worth bringing up to Sean.

In a move I didn’t see coming Linsey gets a rose. Kacie freaks out.

 

Date 3: Tiarra, oops I mean AshLee

This date gets a late start because Tiarra falls down the stairs and needs medical attention. She appears to have a concussion until Sean’s presence mysteriously cures her. She refuses to go to the hospital, opting for Sean’s 1:1 attention instead of medical attention. So we’re left to assume she was ok and was making the whole thing up, but that might be due to some creative editing so I’ll reserve judgment.

AshLee finally gets to go on her theme park date, which turns into a charity event. I think it was really cool what they did, but I only saw parts of it because Bennie had been secretly drinking toilet water while I was running before the show, and decided to relieve himself on my bar stool during this date. So the rest of the episode I was walking my adorable but water-filled Chiweenie and cleaning up after him instead of focusing on the show.

AshLee then tells her adoption story. My former psychology major self is wondering if her OCD-like tendencies and her “personal organizer” career are the result of the need to control her life after living foster home to foster home and being abused when little and some repressed feelings, but… I graduated with a business degree so I could be wrong…

They get a personal concert and she gets a rose.

 

Cocktail Party: 

The claws came out at this cocktail party. Everyone thought they deserved or needed more time with Sean than everyone else. I felt like I was watching a bunch of middle schoolers.

 

Rose Ceremony:

This rose ceremony started with Sean pulling Kacie aside and sending her home. She seemed a little upset, and I really like Kacie, but honestly they never really clicked. I don’t think she really ever crossed from “friend” to “girlfriend” in his mind and the drama she was telling him about only made matters worse.

Sean also sent home Taryn and Kristy.

 

Favorite Quotes:

Tierra: “I get what I want” and “I deserve way more” and “5 minutes is not enough” and basically anything that came out of her mouth had me laughing.

Robyn: “Let’s ditch these b**ches and go fall in love for real”

Sean: “Normally I’d probably wait until the evening to crank up the romance a little bit, but today it’s going to get started a little earlier”

The entire group date (ok someone specifically said this but I’m not sure who): “This Volleyball game is the most important game of my life”

Lindsey: “I never want to stop kissing that man”

Sean: “I can feel the love coming from your heart as you speak”

 

Best Conversations:

Desiree “I did kick butt in volleyball so I feel like I deserve it”  Sean: “You looked so good in your little bikini”

“I hope I get that rose” “And what are you going to do to get it?” “Whatever it takes” – I believe this was Amanda and Kacie but I might be wrong.

 

Twitter Moment of the Week: 

Sean (@SeanLowe09): Lot of comments about the opening gratuitous shirtless shots. Believe it or not I usually wear a shirt when I workout.